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Groundhog Day on the Spiritual Path

There are times in life, particularly if we are consciously working on our spiritual or life path, where we can find ourselves stuck in a loop or a recurrent pattern. This can relate to all sorts of situations and we often repeat a behaviour without being aware of it and are surprised by the response that this behaviour can bring. Often it’s a feeling of “same old, same old”, and that’s the time to really examine what our patterns are and what we can do to bring change.

These behaviours or particular reactions to certain situations have often been with us since early childhood and are patterns we’ve developed to survive or cope in the world as we view it. Some may say they are part of our personality or our make up, or they may even be learned behaviours from the family line. From the bigger picture perspective they are the illusion we have created for this lifetime and are driven by the ego.

Part of our exploration of self is to understand the things that push our buttons, to observe our behaviours at these times and to make changes. These triggers feed into the lessons we have chosen to learn in this lifetime and until we become aware of what the lessons or themes are and how we behave, it can frequently be ‘groundhog day’ in our relationship with the world; a repeated and repetitive pattern of behaviours from which we are unable to break free.

Learning to be an observer of our own behaviour and to recognise why we do what we do is a major lesson to complete. Stepping away from the self we choose to project and watching what we do is not only the beginning of change and a sign of spiritual maturity, it can eventually become an amusing pastime.

What we need to ask ourselves if we are continually being affected negatively by things in our lives, is why we react to these things? Why do we make a drama out of everything or end up with the same unwanted result, and how can we let go of this need. Have we in fact set ourselves up for this in order to learn something or indeed to find the awareness to break the pattern.

The loop we create when we invest in a behaviour with what we perceive as a genuine and valid reason, is self-perpetuating until we step out of that loop and become the observer.

While we’re in the space of being the victim or the one experiencing yet more drama, there is often an expectation that other people should accept and validate us and our drama.

It doesn’t matter what it is that triggers us. It doesn’t matter how terrible it is, how much it has changed or affected our lives or those in our family. It doesn’t matter that we are a victim and maybe we belong to a victim’s group to strengthen our decision to continue to be affected by what has happened.

In order to move forward on our path we need to recognise that our unique view of the world and how we experience it has played its part in making us who we are. And we need to get to the point of awareness where we can say “thank you” for that experience and move on. There is nothing so terrible in life that we cannot move forwards if we choose to do so while we live and breathe.

I know there will be people who would disagree with this, but I’m frequently surprised at the stories people tell me of the horrific things they have experienced in their lives and how they have moved forward and live an outwardly normal life.

Being stuck in a groundhog day loop holds us back from being the best version of ourselves and can create trouble in our relationships, both personal and professional, and taint our view of the world.

If you are really stuck and having trouble particularly with forgiveness you can read the blog on Understanding the Path to Forgiveness which I wrote partly from my own experience.

We all have a choice and the first choice we made – if you are coming from the same place I am writing this from – is that we laid out the experiences we wanted to have in this current incarnation. And these experiences should lead us to the learning we had decided we needed in this lifetime. I often say to clients that those of us who chose tricky situations in our lives have often come in for a last go (hopefully!), gathering all of the most challenging things together for this final push at experience and learning.

Possibly we have great things to do in the world and we’re still searching for our purpose, but it may just be that our choice is firstly about our personal experience and learning for this incarnation and then about what it brings to those around us.

In choosing an image to represent the thoughts in the post, the picture of the fractal or the nautilus shell called out to me. What it says to me is that we start on the outside where the issues and lessons are big, as are the steps. As we move towards the centre of the spiral peeling off the layers and revealing the self through the work we have done and our developing self-awareness, the experiences we have are smaller and less intense, more easily recognisable and more quickly overcome. In the centre of the spiral we find the prize and we find ourselves – or maybe they are one and the same.

In light of the above, we do need to look at what we set up for this lifetime and ask ourselves whether we want to continue to be stuck in this space for ever. Do we need to keep living as if in the Groundhog Day movie or can we choose to step out of the loop and move into something more positive and nurturing. Because if we’re not gaining anything from the current illusion we’re living in and it’s not helping us to grow further, then maybe it’s time to move on?

And the bigger question is: are we living in our heart . . . or are we living in our head and in our wound?

These behaviours can become tiresome for the individual and I do sometimes hear people in clinic say to me “I’m so over this” but then they continue month after month, year after year stuck in the illusion they have created, just unable to let go or find a way to move on.

I had a relatively major issue myself which occurred back in my childhood. At least it seemed so to me and I spent decades bemoaning how terrible this event had been, how it had ruined my life and I could never have the life I deserved because of it. Then as I moved along my path and I started to work with intention, manifestation, detachment and to understand what I had chosen, I started to see the whole event differently. I started to view it as something I had set up as a lesson for this lifetime. I spent a lot of time exploring how many areas of my life it permeated, how it impacted me and what my illusion for this lifetime really was. I was amazed at the ramifications of that one event.

Once I recognised that this was my stuff and not anyone else’s and that I did have the power to change my perception, my life changed. A day came when I realised I had made my peace with it – or so it seemed at that point. I was no longer dwelling on it and no longer blaming the other party. I just accepted that it was done and I was done with it. My own investment and self-obsession kept me bound to that perception and in that loop for so many years.

My biggest learning, however, and one that I often share with my clients, is that we need to work out what we have chosen to work with in this lifetime. And then we need to accept that we never “work through” something fully. If we’ve chosen something for a lifetime of study, then study it we must; from all angles, in all situations, in order for it to bear fruit and for it to help us grow and learn. Recently I’ve had another crack at it myself and received new insights!

With that understanding and observation comes integration of the lessons into our everyday life, in order to make us whole and to allow us to be our most authentic self. Through the integration comes the progression and eventually the awareness and the ability to be detached from this trigger, this event or series of events to which we are attached.

There are always those tiny, everyday things which can side-swipe us but if we are moving in the right direction they should set us up for some observation and understanding. When we drop an egg on the kitchen floor, have an argument with a partner, when the roof leaks or you forget an appointment, I firmly believe all of these things are a direct result of whatever we have been thinking (or not thinking) recently and also what we are working on in the bigger picture. As I said earlier, observation of what triggers us can become an amusing and insightful pastime, and mastery of the process will improve on your powers of manifestation!

So next time you are triggered, step back and observe. Ask yourself whether you are reacting for a good reason or are you just stepping into a situation that you have set up for yourself to learn from, but which has become a continuous loop in which you are stuck.

All these lessons and behaviours took a lot of practise for us to perfect them, for them to become an automatic reaction. To undo them will also take practise, so that eventually we can catch ourselves before we go into full trigger mode and the consequences that often accompany these behaviours.

One day you’ll get to the point where you quickly recognise when you are being set up by your ego, so you can cut the loop and walk away. Practise makes perfect!!!

Melanie Creedy is a UK trained and Australian Registered Homeopath (AROH) and has used homeopathy for 35 years and has been in practice since 1998. For many years she ran The Children’s Ear Clinic in Western Australia, but since her tree change to Tasmania, has a special interest in women’s and children’s health generally and helping individuals manage their journey on the spiritual path with homeopathy and her range of essences.
Melanie works with people on their life path using soul talk and soul listening and intuiting esoteric vibrational remedies to remove obstacles on the path. This can relate to physical, mental and emotional issues which are part of our ‘soul choices’ for this lifetime. She offers distance consultations via phone and skype to allow people Australia-wide to access her services.
Homeopathy is a traditional medicine. It may be used in conjunction with other medicines. For any ongoing chronic condition, it is important to be assessed or examined by your healthcare professional or specialist. Always seek medical advice in emergencies. The information provided in this blog does not constitute medical advice but is for information only. If in doubt as to the appropriateness of a  suggestion or treatment seek advice from your homeopath